Feelings' Projection - Is It Real?
I didn't think projecting feelings was a real thing.
But like many other things I have learnt in past 4 years, it is actually something. And I'm not happy that I'm experiencing these all of a 'sudden'. Why is adulthood so hard?
But, I digress.
Story time.
There once used to be a person in my life. I really liked their soul, I thought. And a feeling similar, for me is rare - well, as rare as only that one time. I literally felt something when I saw them for the first time. And, turned out, how I intuitively reacted was also my brain's reaction when getting to know them. Wow, I hadn't known people could be genuinely this nice. But, you know, 'the more you know'. It seemed like they truly tried to understand me (and everyone around them) and I was doing my best too. But then, time and again, I would get these accusations (comments? self-reflection suggestions? I don't know what the right word is) - of being selfish - at things that first, I never thought would be considered selfish, second didn't have selfish intentions underneath but there was no use explaining the intent. And it was baffling; I thought if you explained something to a human, specially them, it would be understood. Anyway, that was the beginning of me wanting to shut down all the time because I felt misunderstood and unaccepted, well, all the time.
Here were these claims of me being selfish for some reason or the other and years later, when my head has cleared (for the most part), I realize a behavioral pattern. Do you feel like sharing your world with those who you are close to? I haven't met many who don't so if you don't feel like sharing your world and keeping it closed, from your parents, from your best friends, from your partner, you probably feel like everyone else does that too. And even though you do it, you would be bothered if it is reciprocated. And as soon as you see a potential situation where you wouldn't share the joy or pain, you think the other person would do the same and waste no time thinking that they are self-centered or selfish. These are the kinds of people who nag to know everything in their closed ones' lives but won't share what happens in theirs. Even though you might have conversed about the same topic. Convenient. And strange to me. And hurtful to those close to them.
Anyway, I don't want to make any conclusions so I'm just going to leave it at this.
That this is real. And I never thought it would be, but happens a lot more in the real world than I expected. Happenings that are part of novels are so frequently real that there's no point in reading drama novels anymore :P
Kbye.
But like many other things I have learnt in past 4 years, it is actually something. And I'm not happy that I'm experiencing these all of a 'sudden'. Why is adulthood so hard?
But, I digress.
Story time.
There once used to be a person in my life. I really liked their soul, I thought. And a feeling similar, for me is rare - well, as rare as only that one time. I literally felt something when I saw them for the first time. And, turned out, how I intuitively reacted was also my brain's reaction when getting to know them. Wow, I hadn't known people could be genuinely this nice. But, you know, 'the more you know'. It seemed like they truly tried to understand me (and everyone around them) and I was doing my best too. But then, time and again, I would get these accusations (comments? self-reflection suggestions? I don't know what the right word is) - of being selfish - at things that first, I never thought would be considered selfish, second didn't have selfish intentions underneath but there was no use explaining the intent. And it was baffling; I thought if you explained something to a human, specially them, it would be understood. Anyway, that was the beginning of me wanting to shut down all the time because I felt misunderstood and unaccepted, well, all the time.
Here were these claims of me being selfish for some reason or the other and years later, when my head has cleared (for the most part), I realize a behavioral pattern. Do you feel like sharing your world with those who you are close to? I haven't met many who don't so if you don't feel like sharing your world and keeping it closed, from your parents, from your best friends, from your partner, you probably feel like everyone else does that too. And even though you do it, you would be bothered if it is reciprocated. And as soon as you see a potential situation where you wouldn't share the joy or pain, you think the other person would do the same and waste no time thinking that they are self-centered or selfish. These are the kinds of people who nag to know everything in their closed ones' lives but won't share what happens in theirs. Even though you might have conversed about the same topic. Convenient. And strange to me. And hurtful to those close to them.
Anyway, I don't want to make any conclusions so I'm just going to leave it at this.
That this is real. And I never thought it would be, but happens a lot more in the real world than I expected. Happenings that are part of novels are so frequently real that there's no point in reading drama novels anymore :P
Kbye.
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